Almost Already Dead Inside
by DecaTilde
Summary: Brian thinks he has nothing to live for anymore, until he fakes the unthinkable. What will happen when his family doesn't take it well. Based on A Writer With Mixed Interests' one-shot, "Already Dead Inside", with a few elements from "The Secret Life of Brian".


Author's note: This is inspired by A Writer With Mixed Interests' _Family Guy_ oneshot, "Already Dead Inside", which is a request from IHaveFishesSwimmingInMyBelly. However, I'll be adding some elements from my _Family Guy_ fanfic, "The Secret Life of Brian", though.

* * *

 _Almost Already Dead Inside_

a _Family Guy_ one-shot fanfic

by LDEJRuff

* * *

It was one Friday afternoon in the Griffin house. As usual, Peter was at the Drunken Clam with Glenn Quagmire, Cleveland Brown and Joe Swanson. Lois was out shopping. Chris was at a friend's house playing video games. Meg was out fetching Stewie from Day Care and running a few errands. Brian was at home alone, sitting on Peter and Lois' bed in their bedroom, arms and legs crossed, with a briefcase sitting next to him.

After sighing hesitantly, he opened the briefcase to reveal a pistol inside. He stared nervously at it.

 _"Should I do it?"_ he thought to himself. _"Just one blow to the head, and I could end it all."_

Brian thought about what had happened during the eight years of his life. He had dated many women, including the widowed Jillian Russel-Wilcox, Tracy Flannigan (who mothered his son Dylan), Lauren Conrad and a few others. But was he happy with any of them? Many of his dates ended up in disaster. Who could ever learn to love a dog like him?

And what would the Griffins think? Would they still care about him?

He often remembered his on-again-off-again friendship with Stewie. Their relationship took a turn for the worse when he dated a girl named Cassidy, whom he recently broke up with. And since then, they never re-dated.

Peter rarely invited him for drinks at the Clam, or even anything anymore. Brian even admitted his love for Lois, but that relationship never returned. Meg idolized him, but her obsession with him went too far. Chris rarely even noticed Brian was there...well, for a few times.

Then, there was his rivalry with Glenn. Glenn chewed Brian out for being the person he was: a big, sad, alcoholic bore.

And his writing career was terrible. He wrote and published, twice, but his books were ridiculed. That made him worse than he already was.

So, what was the point of even trying anymore? Who would miss him, besides his gay cousin, Jasper? That's just it, there was nobody.

"Oh, who the hell am I kidding?" he asked himself aloud. "I'm a failure. I'm nothing but a completely useless, utter failure."

Putting the gun back into the briefcase, he found a diary in Meg's room, tore a piece of paper out of it and grabbed a pen from her writing utensil cup.

After folding the paper hamburger-style and writing "I'm sorry" in big letters, he wrote what he hoped to be his suicide note inside, about three quarters of a page long. After all, there wasn't much to say. He'd just write a small message to his family and go from there.

It didn't take him long to finish. When he did, he walked downstairs to the living room and laid the note on the TV stand where they'd find it.

Paws shaking, he took the gun from the briefcase once again, and was about to pull the trigger. However, something widened his eyes, and he let go of the gun. He had an idea.

* * *

A few minutes have passed since. Stewie walked inside the house, Rupert in hand, with Meg following. Stewie started to skip happily to the stairs.

"I know you're up there, Brian!" he taunted. "It's time for us to play house. As usual, I'll play the dad, and you'll be the worthless mutt. You can't hide from me forever, Brian."

Stewie searched all over the bedrooms for him, until he found something unexpected inside his parents' bedroom. It nearly made him faint, but instead, he screamed.

"BRIAN! BRIAN!" he ran to what appeared to be a lifeless Brian, a pool of blood had formed under the corpse. "Wake up, dammit! This isn't funny!"

Back downstairs, Meg had found the note by the TV, and she was about to read it when she heard her little brother scream. She was aware what the note was about before she ran upstairs to find the two in the bedroom.

"Brian!" she screeched. "Oh, my God!"

"Dammit, Brian, you _can't_ die," Stewie pleaded. He burst into tears as soon as Meg did. "Wake up!"

"Stewie," Meg cried, gently. "I don't think Brian _will_ be waking up."

"Don't _tell_ me that!" Stewie hollered. "We've got to help him!"

As Meg called the police and the rest of the family about it, she didn't know what _really_ happened.

* * *

Outside, blocks away from Spooner Street, Brian, carrying his briefcase and a bag on a pole, looked over his shoulder.

 _"I hope I know what I'm doing,"_ he thought. _"It_ _is_ _for the best."_

 ** _Flashback:_** _Brian rushed into Stewie's room and quickly eyed the crib. He then pressed a button on the wall near the crib, and a small door opened, revealing a key pad. He then pressed a few keys on the pad, and the crib instantly transformed into a machine with a ray over a pad. He typed the coordinates on the attached computer and got on the pad, which lit up under him. The ray activated, zapping Brian. After the zapping was done, he just stood there. The computer showed a loading screen._

 _"Come on," Brian pleaded, looking at the screen, his paws clenched. "Come on."_

 _When the loading screen got to 100%, a small surge of energy was heard. Brian then pressed a few keys on the key pad, which turned the machine back into Stewie's crib. Afterwards, he then pressed the button that closed the small door that hid the keypad, and rushed back into Peter and Lois' bedroom to find another Brian on the bed. It was a clone he just made of himself. He was aware to find him._

 _"Okay, you know what to do?" Brian asked._

 _"Yes," the clone answered._

 _The clone then grabbed the gun from Brian's briefcase and put it next to his head. His stubby finger practically glued to the trigger._

 _Taking one last breath, he looked at Brian at the door, sadly._

 _"Take good care of yourself," the clone said softly before pulling the trigger._

 _A shot was heard, loud enough for all of Spooner Street to hear, and Brian was spattered with the clone's blood. He didn't flinch._

 _"I_ _will_ _," he replied to the clone, posthumously, before turning away and walking off._

* * *

After the rest of the Griffins rushed home, Peter thought that Meg was bluffing until he saw the lifeless body he thought was Brian. He immediately began hollering and tossed things around, letting loose a slew of censored profanities.

"Oh, my God," Chris began, tears forming in his eyes upon seeing the dead body. "Mom, is he...?"

"Yes, Chris," Lois answered, voice breaking. "I'm afraid...I'm afraid that our Brian is dead."

* * *

Within the next few weeks, Brian moved into a tiny apartment in Providence owned by an old man named Leo. He managed to move on and start a new life, even though Leo had already owned another dog. It didn't take long for Brian to learn that the dog Leo owned, Vinny (who appeared to be a cross between a Pit Bull and a German Shepherd, had tan fur with some cream white from his nose all the way to his belly, and wore a black collar), was his little brother. Brian had learned about that from his former owners from Texas, Luke and Betty.

While Brian had adjusted to his new life, he thought sadly about the supposed suicide he wrote, and his former family members.

 _To My Family,_

 _By the time you read this, I will be gone. But please, don't worry over me. Please. I'm sure you can all get along without me. I'm sure it won't seem like it at first, but just bear with me, because you will. I'm going to miss each and every one of you, I hope you know that. But I just can't handle the cruelty of this world anymore, so I'm going to say my good-byes and farewells to all of you one by one._

 _Peter, you're my best friend. I'm going to miss going out for drinks or even just spending time with you. I'm going to miss correcting your wrong remarks and all of the guiding that I had to give you. But every time you take a swig of that Pawtucket beer, just think of me, okay? And think of me before you do something that would get you killed. You'll pull through, I know you will._

 _Lois, I think you already know this by now, but I have always loved you. I loved you no matter what, even though I knew that the favor would never be returned. But I know that you love Peter, and I tried to respect that as much as I possibly could. And I'm sorry for all those times I offended you. I just hope one day you can forgive me._

 _Meg, you have grown into such a wonderful young woman, and I'm happy to call you my friend. Now, don't let those popular kids at school give you a hard time, you hear me? You're so much better than all of them. You're bound for great and amazing things, and you're so strong to overcome all that you've been through. Good luck in life._

 _Chris, you and I have never spent that much time together, but I believe that you have great potential to do something with your life. Do this society a favor and show off your paintings more. Maybe you could become the next Picasso and get some of them in a museum. Please take my advice and go for the goals._

 _Stewie, I really enjoyed all the adventures we went through together, like going to Texas, going to Europe, that kind of thing. When I wasn't with your dad, I was with you about ninety percent of the time. Even though there were some things that I didn't particularly enjoy, we stuck together through thick and thin. I'm sorry our friendship basically broke apart after I dated Cassidy Booker, I just wish that I had the strength to pull it back together after she and I broke up. But promise me that you won't do something drastic, okay? If you can go on after losing Rupert for awhile, you can go on without_ _me_ _. I just know it._

 _You've given me a wonderful life. I love you all._

 _Brian._

* * *

When the Griffins read the note that day, they huddled and cried. And if anyone were to walk into the living room that moment, they'd have found them like this.

"My God, Brian," Peter sobbed, hugging Lois and clutching the letter. "I just wish you were here."

"We _all_ wish he were here, Peter," Lois added.

* * *

Brian assumed to be right a couple months later. The Griffins managed to move on without him. Peter didn't do many dumb things anymore, and became a fisherman. Lois remained a housewife, but when she saw a white dog, she always thought of Brian. Meg changed a bit, and Connie D'Amico stopped bullying her after hearing about Brian. Chris took Brian's advice and became a well-known artist. Stewie, for his second birthday, got a stuffed white dog, and named it after Brian, and took it anywhere with him like he did Rupert.

Sure, the Griffins still missed Brian, but they knew he was alive in their hearts.

As for Brian, he and Vinny went along just fine, even after Leo started dating. With that, Brian learned to renew his love life all over again. He may not have been the Griffins' dog anymore, but he still lived on.

* * *

The End

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Author's note: I hope everyone, including A Writer With Mixed Interests and IHaveFishiesSwimmingInMyBelly, enjoyed this fanfic, and how I based it on "Already Dead Inside".


End file.
